Real Estate Vocabulary

In honor of studying for my Broker's Exam, I thought I would write an entry about the vocabulary that really is used in real estate listings. These are not the legal terms that all agents and brokers are required to learn for their state licensing requirements, rather, words that are used in the marketing of our listings on a regular basis.

This vocabulary is intended to help the average consumer understand what they see in our listings just a little bit better.

Without further ado:

A

Approximately XXX square feet - We have no idea how big it actually is.

B

Beautiful - The most overused of all Realtor terms. Means "I lacked inspiration and I read somewhere that using the word 'beautiful' will inspire buyers to pay more for this house."

Big enough for the whole family -As long as it is a family of mice.

C

Custom - Seller had it built/installed himself. You will probably want to tear it out/down.

Cute - Small. Very, very small.

D

Den - The oddly-shaped, windowless room under the stairs.

Designer Paint - Not white.

E

Elegant - Everything the seller owns is in storage right now.

Exquisite - Similar to "Beautiful."

F

Finishes (as in, "top-quality finishes throughout") - Normal people refer to this as trim or woodwork. May mean that the seller bought a $15 door trim kit and installed it himself, then added $1,000 to the price.

First-Time Buyers (as in, "Attention First-Time Buyers!") - People with no money, willing to live anywhere.

G

Garage - This is the room that your cars may or may not fit into, after you load it up with all of your stuff.

H

Handyman's Special - Tear down that may actually be falling down. Get an inspection.

I

Investor's Dream - Cheap. See Handyman's Special.

J

Just Listed - This house has been on the market for three months. Please buy it before the seller fires me.

K

Kitchen Upgrades - The garbage disposal (refrigerator, diswasher--insert your appliance of choice) crapped out and the seller had to buy a new one. And he would like YOU, Mr. Buyer, to double his money.

L

Lots of Upgrades - We painted.

M

Many Upgrades - We had the carpets cleaned.

N

Natural Setting - You have to go 10 miles down a dirt road to get to it, if you can ever find it.

O

Open Space - The county won't let me build on it but is taxing me for it anyway.

P

Pastoral Setting - See "Natural Setting." Think of the movie "Deliverance."

Q

Quality (as in "Quality Finishes") - Home Depot special.

R

RV Space - We paved over our entire yard.

S

Seller is motivated - Desperation, people. It's not pretty.

Staged - The listing agent made the seller get rid of his stuff, and also his 30 cats.

T

Truly (as in "Truly beautiful") - I had some extra space in this ad, and nothing else relevant to say.

U

Unbelievable - This one depends on context. If it says "unbelievable view," the house probably has a pretty good view although it may or may not be obstructed. If, however, it just says "Unbelievable!" that usually means that we're hoping you won't notice that the roof is about to cave in. It's only unbelievable because you won't believe someone would actually list their house for sale with it looking like this.

V

Value-Priced - House has nothing going for it except a low price. See "Handyman's Special."

W

Well-appointed - The seller is taking everything with them.

X

Extra Large - Average size.

Y

Why Wait? - Frequently seen on new construction. Means roughly "We're lowering the price in a week." You should wait.

Z

Zilch - Hey, I did pretty good keeping this up all the way until the end but I can't think of anything for Z.

This list is mostly for fun, but I also wrote it to let buyers know that sometimes, words don't mean what they seem to mean. So, read carefully, and to get the most from your home search work with a buyer's agent who previews properties for you.

This is also an admonition to those of us in the business to remember that a lot of these words are overused, and in some cases are not understood the way we meant them, so we must choose our words carefully!